Ladies and gentlemen:
Recently we found out about the new dissonance of the ineffable office of the Governance Secretary. They say that the Zapatistas can march to Mexico City "if and when they present themselves without masks." Given that all we can say is:
Hijole!! If they only knew!!
Well then, I entrust the attached communiqué. The Zup (as pronounced by Yeniperr), always willing to cooperate in the work of the mass media, presents the following informative report about the new communiqué of the easyelen. The report follows the well-known technique of the "inverted pyramid" (which no one else seems to use) in order to facilitate the work and not cause problems, At the end, without extra cost, you will find the complete communiqué. You're welcome.
THE ZUP, SUPERSPECIAL REPORTER, LACANDON JUNGLE, 20-WHATEVER OF AUGUST OF 1997. In a communiqué dated on the 22nd of this month, the alleged Zup made public the route to be followed by the representatives of the 1,111 villages which form the ranks of the EZLN. According to the rebel communiqué, the march will leave the state of Chiapas on September 9th (which is still surprising, because everyone supposed that the 1,111 were already in Mexico City and the announcement of the march was solely so that Ruiz Ferro could look ridiculous by offering the protection of his police), and after a farewell ceremony in San Cristobal de Las Casas, would walk to the Federal District through the states of Oaxaca, Puebla, and Morelos.
The insurgents state the dates in which they expect to be in Oaxaca, Puebla and Morelos and they say that they will arrive at the Zocalo of the capital on September 12th.
The EZLN, as everyone knows, made its public appearance on January 1 of 1994, and since that date has dedicated itself to pestering the Supreme Government will all kinds of absurd ideas. A year ago, the easyelenists suspended the talks with the Supreme Government alleging they were unwilling to collaborate with the governmental farce. The Supreme Government protested vehemently, stating that all available theater space had already been rented.
The Zup, a handsome and enchanting guerrilla who says he is military chief of the Zapatistas, once again recurs to the mischievous and playful style which gives so much happiness and joy to the old and young, and inserts, without explanation, a few stories within the letter of presentation for the communiqué, etcetera. The jumbled tales are disconcerting to say the least and it is clear that the Zup uses the communiqués as a pretext to offend with impunity the history of universal literature. What is true is that; the ineffable government intelligence services (if any are left) who are usually terribly bored in San Cristobal, are now very busy trying to decipher the meaning of this collection of stories called,
TALES OF THE SEA HORSE (FOR THE SEA)
Introduction.- The sea horse, as indicated by the name is a walking (or swimming) contradiction. So it should not surprise use that without askin much less getting permission, it has inserted itself into the dreams of the sea. The sea, as usual, has insomnia. So in order to secure sleep, the sea horse tells tales, tales like this one...
Roman Numeral One Tale: "The 600"
"The numbers in the 600's are quite envious. For example, it so happened one afternoon I overheard a discussion between 609, 665 and 637. The subject was, as usual, 616.
"He is so spoiled!" -609 said angrily, who could not forgive 616 because he always followed him.
"He's hateful!" -637 almost screamed, who was jealous of 616 because he was always in front of him.
"Intolerable!" -argued 665, who found the proportion of 616 hard to tolerate.
"We must get rid of him!" -brayed the 687, who could not accept the fact that 616 added up to the mysterious "13" when you added up his digits.
They conspired these numbers 600's against the 616 (the rest of the 600's were too busy holding their place in the tale of the sea in order to participate in this tale), and they took the number 616 prisoner and banished him to the land of the 700 numbers.
That is why when the sea counts sea-horses in order to get to sleep, when it arrives at 615 it becomes confused and cannot continue. Therefore it goes quickly to sleep.
And the number 616? He was detected almost immediately by the repressive forces of the 700's. He was accused of being a destabilizing and incompatible force and condemned to dissolve 88 times until reaching his 7 of origin.
Tan, tan" [The End].
Roman Numeral Two Tale: "The 100"
"No one would think it, but the 100's are much more complicated than the rest of the numbers. According to them they reflect good taste and exclusivity. "To be within the 100's" they say "is a sign of good taste and lineage". This arrogance is reflected in the daily behavior of the 100's. Number 101, for example, believes he is unique and original, he sees himself as alpha and omega. The rest share this sentiment. "After us, there is only the common folk" says the slogan of the "Club of the 100" which, as its number indicates only has 100 members.
Tan, Tan" [The End]
Roman Numeral Three Tale: "The 1"
"The number one is well known for being the most elusive of the numbers. And rightly so, I mean it is enough to know that when one has 1, one wants two.
Tan, Tan" [The End]
Roman Numeral Four Tale: "The 200"
"The 200's are frankly numbers which tend to be aquatic. They have the irrefutable shape of a duck which since their beginning makes them a common sight floating on the dreams of the sea.
Tan, Tan" [The End]
End of Tales.
Communiqué of the Indigenous Revolutionary Clandestine Committee General Command
Zapatista Army of National Liberation